This week has been pretty fucking exciting because I’ve been personally, sexually challenged. I discovered a new sex guru. A woman who speaks my language. My first experience of her was to read her quote: “Behind every good woman is a man, on his knees, thrusting voraciously.” Kim Anami. Thank you, Kim!
INSPIRATION
#KimAnami frightens me a little bit and I LOVE it. If you’re frightened by me, just be ready for HER if you decide to check out her website, link above. Wait until you hear what she has to say about deep-throating and anal sex!! I’m enjoying this fright I’m feeling because I know what it truly means – that I have some WORK to do! I get to explore further and deeper into my sexuality and my sexual being-ness as a woman. She has challenged me. I can go deeeeeeeeeper (you must know by now how much I love the word DEEEEP) into myself and into the realm of female orgasmic pleasure. She has a wealth of knowledge about how to reach into our female roots, reach into our female lusciousness, and reach our full orgasmic blissful potential.
This whole business that made the news recently of Mike Pence (our current VP, in case anyone doesn’t know) stating he wouldn’t choose to dine with another woman, alone, unless it was his wife, has me deeply disturbed. Not that I wasn’t disturbed already regarding our current administration. Further there was a comment I read from a woman regarding the VP’s stance and THAT was the real clincher. This woman believed in the VP’s proclamation and further stated that, “if [I] didn’t respect the VP’s position, then [I’d] never been in a healthy relationship.” Yes, she used the word HEALTHY. Now, I’m not going to proclaim I’ve had THE healthiest relationships. I mean, at the very least I seem to gravitate towards messiness, but I’m going to whole-heartedly state – that’s fucked up and it’s total bullshit and I absolutely hope you are NOT buying into it. These are some of the lies we have been choosing to believe, as women, and they are keeping us from our fullest potential.
WHERE’S THE JUICINESS GONE?
We’ve apparently gotten so far from ourselves as women, so separated from our delicious juicy-ness as females, that some actually believe this condescending, patriarchal BS. I say “WE” because I’m baffled by myself as a woman at times, and I clearly resonate with the fact that as women we’ve chosen to go down a path that has essentially destroyed our sexual prowess. We live in a country that believes women’s value is less than men’s, yet in the same breath proclaim we have FREEDOM in this country. We can no longer tolerate or accept even the smallest infractions with just an eye roll or a shrug of the shoulders. And I’m preaching to myself too!
I haven’t had a conversation with the VP, I admit. There may be more to this story than I’m realizing, but this has the opposite effect on me than it has had on the woman who believes that it is “true love” for a man to disregard half of our race, as if he has the “right” to do so. To me it sounds more like, not only is the VP ”co-dependent”, but also the VP is hiding some pretty serious sexual hang-ups under the guise of being chivalrous. What I hear the VP saying is, “I’m so afraid of a woman’s power that I don’t trust myself to be around her.” Sexual hang-ups are running rampant in this FREE country and we’ve bought into them. I have so many questions for myself and for all women: when did we start believing the lies, when did we start handing over the wealth of our sexual power? And WHY?? Ladies, when are we going to admit we’ve given away our sexuality AND when are we going to start reclaiming it?
LADY PARTS & MAN PARTS = DELICIOUS!
I don’t personally identify with the word “feminist” nor do I believe I am “one”. I am HAPPY we have feminists and I’m thankful for the work they do. To be honest, I’m a little bit of a sucker for “chivalry” if and when it makes sense. In other words, if upon entering a restaurant a man opens a door for me, I like it. But, I’m not going to wait in the car while he walks around to open my car door for me. I believe men and women should be paid equally; I believe men and women are EQUALS. I don’t believe we are the same. I appreciate the differences – acknowledging that both must be celebrated. I love being a woman and I appreciate a MAN being a man (I especially appreciate his man parts).
What the VP is saying when he proclaims no dining with any woman (alone) other than his wife is: “I don’t trust myself to be around HER.” Is he afraid he might accidentally, or purposefully, grab her pussy? Or, that he will want to fuck her? What is this guise of supposed commitment that he’s latching onto? It truly baffles me. But it certainly takes me back to my days of Christianity – and the concept that Eve tempted Adam and hence we have the “downfall of man.” What a way to put us women in our places! We’re the temptresses who lead men to sin. We’re the CAUSE of men’s wrongdoing. Nevermind the CHOICES we all have. Ladies – stop believing these lies and RECLAIM what is rightfully yours.
3-RING ORGASMIC CIRCUS!
You know I’m going to bring this conversation to the bedroom. I’m so READY to start hearing from all you ladies that you’ve started cumming over and over and over again. Apparently, even I have “work” to do as I stated above. Kim Anami has given me a goal – the clitoral orgasm is essentially only meant to be a “warm-up” to our deeper potential of the ultimate, life-changing – cervical orgasm. There are many orgasmic possibilities, as you should know already if you’ve read my first blog post on V-Day this year. If you haven’t read that – I highly recommend it. Squirting and G-spot orgasms. My conversations are meant to empower exploration. But all of a sudden I have an understanding of your potential fears because I’m feeling that too, myself. I’m going to go ahead and transform this fear into action. … and continue to further explore my sexual health and well-being, per Kim’s instruction.
Somewhere along the line as women we decided to give up on orgasms…. and even fake them, buying into the idea that we don’t need them or don’t really want them. Men followed that lead. We’ve been shamed into believing we have to choose: we are “wholesome and good girls” (by not CRAVING orgasms) OR we are whores (by WANTING and HAVING sex). Wholesome and good meant that we couldn’t WANT sex, let alone HAVE a lot of it. Is it “easier” for you guys too, maybe? To not even want to give us ladies orgasms? Ya, I suppose so if you think it takes a lot of thrusting. But, guys, isn’t it just the absolute BEST to watch your woman cum??? I don’t understand, first of all, how you can’t KNOW if your woman is faking. And women are faking. All the time. Because they are sick of the jack-hammering. Remember? I discussed this already. Porn is NOT what women want in bed. The lusciousness of sex begins LONG before you get to the bedroom. It begins to happen the moment you wake up – how you speak to each other throughout the day – whether or not you both luxuriate in the little things that abso-fucking-lutely matter. Did you offer to stop at the grocery store on the way home for instance? Did you send your lover a sexy text or selfie? And, second-of-all, how you can so easily allow your lady lover give up her orgasm? She will thank you for it, in the end, if you insist she cum before you do. Women are guilty of shying away from the attention and the “pressures” of orgasm. Too bad. Time to stop that nonsense and it’s going to take BOTH parties.
Ultimately, ladies, we are in the lead on this. Our men are following our cues. While I whole-heartedly believe (and love) Kim’s quote above, we cannot nag our men into “voraciously thrusting” for us, or into doing anything for us by saying no to our own sexual pleasures. We MUST start scheduling SEX into the routine. Just like you schedule your workouts, or your haircuts, or your nails. Stop with the BUSY-ness and distractions of “life” and start treating sex as an important practice. It’s one thing that will make you happier, healthier, juicier.
When we are getting FUCKED properly …. then we no doubt are going to be much kinder to our baristas and our bosses and our children. It has to be a practice and it must be at the top of the list. THAT’s what will create a healthy relationship, not declining dinner with a colleague because she’s female. But I’m certainly going to emphasize PROPERLY here. When we are getting fucked properly. This is NOT the 3-5 minute routine you may have gotten into. Let’s start thinking outside that limited, narrow, unacceptable box.
SEX BUCKET LISTS
So let’s make a SEX BUCKET LIST!! I mean it! Use your current journal OR just grab a piece of paper and a pen, or the memo pad on your phone which we all have constantly right in our hands, or very nearby. I will, of course, get us started. And this is taking some serious thinking on my part because I’ve done quite a lot of sexual exploring; I haven’t been too timid, nor have I really held myself back. Mostly, I like to involve the outdoors, or places where I’m not in my bedroom. So, here goes my list:
- Sex with 2 men; yep, double penetration, why not? (preferably w/brothers or maybe a father/son combo)
- where do I go from there?
- cervical orgasms
- multiple orgasms, simultaneously (I already have multiples)
- Sex vacations (it’s the only focus) – I stole this idea from Kim.
- ? there’s more, I’m sure.
Here are some of my former exploits, to help YOU get inspired on your list:
- Sex everywhere and anywhere
- A lot of sex (i.e. at the kitchen sink, in the shower)
- Sex in cars, beside a river, places where I might be “caught”
- Sex on a beach (watch out for that sand!)
- Romantic sex – ie sitting on his lap, taking him fully, deeply, looking into his eyes, cumming at the same time
- Let him cum on my tits (or maybe my face)
I’m obviously being a little bit superficial here but you get my drift, right? I want you to start thinking about WHAT excites you!?!? Even allowing yourself the opportunity to THINK about it will probably boost your bedroom bliss. And maybe these are FANTASIES – things that won’t become a reality. Just allow for all possibilities, expand your thinking, explore the depths of your desires. Then share them with your partner! Or, keep them secret for a while if you’re too embarrassed to share them YET.
So, today is 4/20. You know what I’m gonna go do. Ya, I’m gonna reach over and grab my blue dong and DO MYSELF.
Have a great week – please share your Sex Bucket List w/me if you dare! I won’t post it.
XOXOxxxo